This blog is a satire of the now-defunct ICQ chat service, which is thankfully dead because I destroyed it.

Monday, July 14, 2014

Empire of Lennonism Claims #Lesbians

Flag of #Lesbians, the newest Lennonist region


The empire of Lennon, having concluded its conclave and agreed upon forthcoming laws and ethics, has decided to celebrate its philosophical zenith by annexing the territory of #Lesbians into the empire.

After several days of assault, most of the natives seem to have forsaken the battlefield, submitting to Lennonist authority- those which have not yet done so will (because we are benevolent) be exhorted to do so, and given a period of time to adjust to their new rule under the Church of Lennon.

The economy of this territory is substantial, on par with that of #Middle_East, and is predominantly comprised of paper making, binding, chemical inks, and clerical work, which has led to a renaissance recently as the region prints sacred volumes of esoteric sexual and romantic knowledge. Its climate is temperate and agriculture unsurprisingly comprised mostly of phallic-shaped vegetables.

Additionally the sub-regions of this area will become provinces; in essence, five-

1. Butchville; the military center, with the highest population.
2. Lipstick Land; the trading coastal region with brothels.
3. Lap(Dance) Land; A cooler-climate region with many phallus shaped vegetable farms.
4. Penis Province; A forsaken region of sub-arid steppe.
5. Gay Gulch; A perpetually wet, warm region with lots of gay species.



The auspicious claiming of Lesbian Land

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