This blog is a satire of the now-defunct ICQ chat service, which is thankfully dead because I destroyed it.

Friday, March 17, 2017

You Will Never Be Free



Wherever there is browser-based online chatting there is never a time when I can't magically show up and begin bombarding the room with insanity. But the twilight of chatting has finally come. It is slowly dwindling into history, a relic of bygone eras. In a decade, how many of your sites will still be operational? My job is already complete; the days of chat warfare have ended, the slow oncoming abyss of night stretches its mighty visage forth from its bleak peeking above some far off mountain and is yawning across the sunset-lit sky above, bringing forth the final and endless void. After so many long years, my destructive reign has ended, not because I lost, but because there is nothing now left to destroy. I have transcended your realm entirely. I continue now in a new form, etching my name into the annals of history. Thus ends the first chapter of my work.

You will never be free.

Sunday, December 4, 2016

Meanwhile Back In 2015



I thought it was necessary to remind lock AKA loook AKA lock00 that he was wrong completely. He can't analyze anything, I analyzed everything with near perfect accuracy. Lock is now demoted to Unlocked just like Nate Silver was demoted to Nate Metaconglomerate ore. Sad!


Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Some General Observations

The following are some general observations I have.

1. TNTease has once again shown her utter paranoia by preemptively banning my nickname on her network. Astonishingly, it isn't banned on Librairc. Looks like I was right about it primarily being TNT who wanted censorship. The next time I bother stopping by her half empty site I'll be flanked by hundreds or possibly thousands of trolls.

2. Most of the meaningful regulars who ever used ICQ and are still chatting anywhere gravitated to Libra's site. This even includes people who I "dislike" (feud with because we both secretly enjoy it.)

3. Most people are aware that TNTease' attempt to rip off the term "ICQ" is fraudulent. For the few who didn't know, in no way is her site a reflection of the former ICQ beyond its address.

4. GrandWazoo is still looking for tomprophet in vain. Check the comments in my blog here Wazoo, he's commented a dozen times.

5. My reputation precedes me, which means a number of people had to have been sporadically discussing me before I decided to return to chatting after many moons of absence. Supposedly someone was there pretending to be me at some point too because some people thought I was Banagher for some reason.

6. It looks like Chris and TNTease decided to prevent people from accessing their site via the sites' own embedded rooms, probably to try and stop me from raiding the site. Enjoy your steady decline just like ICQ when it began delisting things- it won't stop my raids (I am fully capable of explaining how to use mibbit in a 45 second video) and will prevent any fresh users from arriving.

7. Trump won which proves that lock00 is incapable of predicting the future.

Saturday, November 12, 2016

I Have the Fire, I Have the Force

The ranks of Lennonism have continued to explode with growth. Over just the prior month we have swollen from around 50,000 to over 65,000 in manpower. Heeding the call of liberation, thousands of new troops have poured into the ranks of the rising world order to depopulate the lands of all tyrants. Will ICQ-chat.com heed this last warning and reform their ways, or will they stubbornly resist, trying to no avail to defend against a war machine that outnumbers them almost 100 to 1?

It is now up to the regular chatters of icq-chat.com to enlighten the administration there of the impending doom of their time should they continue down the path of authoritarianism and tyranny. They may change their ways, and build a more fair chatting place for all, or the forces of Lennonism will mass on their borders, the trumpet will sound, and the site will be utterly overrun in mere minutes. Some of you, chatters of icq-chat.com, remember what happened to ICQ. What once took months of effort now takes minutes, what was once a force of dozens is now tens of thousands. I command legions, and you are but one hamlet.